It is here. No turning back. I am literally hours from my 40th birthday. And I dont know what to do. I am cleaning the house per usual. I am washing dishes and paying bills and all the while in the back of my mind I am thinking:
Tomorrow I turn 40.
I am also having PMS, which is so unfortunate for everyone involved. When my dear husband realized these two events were culminating on the same weekend he deemed them "the perfect storm." He then asked, quietly, with both love and fear in his eyes..."What should I do?"
Tomorrow I turn 40.
40. The same age my mom was when I was 19. But she was so...old. Is this how she felt? She felt like she was young and hip and full of life and surely only 29, or 33 tops? Because I am still young! I am not a "ma'am!" I am not "Mrs. Corrona!" (well, I am, but you know what I mean..) This is all so weird. I was just 30. I blinked my eyes, (or is it 'blunk' my eyes? or 'blanked' my eyes? It's already happening, improper grammar usage... another casualty of age) and had gray hairs and wrinkles and "mom arms" and, well, other stuff.
I am sitting at my computer dressed, with a towel on my head, having just showered; having just contemplated the meaning of this monumental day that is so quickly approaching. Every minute another piece of my youthful self disappearing in the sands of time. (It seems I am becoming more dramatic by the minute, too...)
Tomorrow I turn 40.
I already know it will be just another day. Really, nothing will change. I will (God willing) awaken as usual, get kids off to school, do some dishes, and live another day. But I will be 40. F-O-R-T-Y. for-tay. fordee. no longer 39,
Tomorrow I turn 40.
WELCOME! We've been expecting you. You'll do just fine, Kendra. The 40s are pretty dang awesome, if you ask me. :)
ReplyDeleteThank you ward!! I am girding myself up for Nate's months of torture before he hits 40 in May!
DeleteOh my dear friend...I am right behind you! Bring on the wrinkle cream and anti water retention supplements! Seriously...what kind of miracle will reduce the puffiness under my eyes? And what in the heck is up with the zits I'm still getting? I thought that was the ONE THING that would be a positive circumstance with age! At any rate, we know that along with our physical degradation comes spiritual restoration. He is strong when we are weak. I am grateful for the humbling experience such is life to bring forth the greatness of Him. Although...I'm still asking Jesus about the zits when I get to heaven. Love you girlfriend!
ReplyDeletehaha! Adele I totally understand! Broken out on my 40th birthday--who would have thought?! So thankful to still know you after all of these years, sweet friend. Sending lots of love, and see you on the other side! (of 40!)
DeleteThink of it this way... YOU will make turning F-O-R-T-Y look dog gone good for all those who will be approaching it!!! And might I add, turning 50 is no different. I still "feel" very young at heart!! <3
ReplyDeleteyou make 40 look good :)
ReplyDelete<3 Michelle...
PS I am not far behind ya! ;)
i'm not far behind you either and my brain just can't process it. 40 is the new 30 right? right? please tell me i'm right?!?!
ReplyDeleteso crazy friends! thanks for your words of encouragement :)
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad I read this - I needed it today - and about the zits...what in the world? Who would have known!? I didn't have one in High School. Great writing, Kendra!
ReplyDelete